Thursday, February 07, 2008

The Patriots won in Nicaragua

This is fantastic, both for humanitarian and humorous reasons ...

Being so sure of their victory that they were inviting members of the Giants to their post-superbowl parties, the Patriots printed up a huge number of T-shirts and sweaters declaring "Patriots, 19-0, Superbowl Champions". Unfortunately (or fortunately for the Giants, the '72 Dolphins and pretty much everyone outside of New England), the Patriots complete one of the greatest chokes in football history and lost the game. So what becomes of these now useless articles of clothing?

As they have been every year since 1994, they are donated to World Vision, an international Christian charity, for donation to poor people in a 3rd world country. This year, they are going ot Nicaragua, where "As soon as the gear arrives, poor children across Nicaragua will be transformed into unwitting members of Patriots Nation." In fact, "It will be a parallel universe, where the Patriots had a perfect season," said Karen Kartes, a spokeswoman for World Vision, the charity that will be delivering the items.

I mean, props to the NFL for not wasting the clothes and donating them to a worthy cause. That is awesome. But there is still something hilarious and wrong with the idea that days after the Patriots have completed one of the most epic letdowns in sports history, their most prominent fans will not be people in New England, but poor, rural Nicaraguans who have no idea that the clothes they are wearing testify to an alternate, non-existent reality ...

And another thing, how ridiculous is it that every year professional sports have to waste money making thousands of articles of clothing just so people can order it immediately when the game is finished. Would it be so hard to wait one or two days? Are the teams afraid people will forget they won?

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